Overheard...

We were watching How I Met Your Mother on Netflix, and the episode synopsis mentioned that someone *might* be a call girl...

The Boy Child (11) asked me, "what's a call girl?"

I deftly answered "Someone that gets paid to go on dates." He was satisfied with this answer.

The hubster and The Girl Child (9) walked in and said "Oh yeah, your son wants to know what a call girl is..."

I said, "Yeah, I already told him, 'Its someone that gets paid to go on dates.'"

...to which The Girl Child quipped, "Oh, like a hooker."

Send wine. Lots and lots of wine.

What Doesn't Kale You...

And now...for something completely different and unexpected...a food tutorial type thingy.

Over the last year, the Pandora household has taken to expanding our dietary horizons and eating things we have never tried before. Specifically in the vegetable arena. Out of all of the new veggies that we added to our repertoire, kale is, hands down, the favorite.

Now, it has come to our attention that kale can be gross, if prepared the wrong way. So far, we have been lucky, and seem to have stumbled across a fairly fool-proof kale cooking method. (I hesitate to call it a recipe, as I am way too vague for that shit.)

I am nothing if not candid about the fact that, whenever possible, I'm lazy. For this reason? Unless I have no other option, I will always get the bagged kale, that is pre shredded or whatever. Go ahead, judge me. Heaven knows it won't be the first time.

Great, now that we have properly demonized me, let's dive in.

Large pan, olive oil, Minnie Mouse timer.

Start with a nice, big, deep pan that has a nice snug lid. 

Uncooked kale is fluffy. Cooked kale is not. It shrinks ALOT. 

And if it turns out really well? The last thing you want is to have half a bag of uncooked kale mocking you, while your plate and pan are empty. 

So you want a nice deep pan. Trust me on this. 

Add approximately 2-3 tbsp of olive oil, and heat it for about 2 minutes. 

Add 4-5 (or more, if you either fear vampires or want to repel any errant and unwelcome requests for a kiss) cloves of garlic, minced, or freshly pressed. 

Heat on low, until the garlic starts to get really fragrant...about 1 minute.

Note, this is *not* a heaping quantity.
This is about 1/3 the final heap

Add the kale. Heaping amounts of it. 

Turn it and flip it in the oil/garlic mixture, until it is well coated, then salt it.

Nice, secure lid...

Add about 1/3-1/2 cup of water, and cover the kale. 

Make sure the heat is on LOW, then walk away from it for about 3-5 minutes. Turn on a song, and dance your butt off. I highly recommend Jimmy Eat World, "In the Middle". It's about 3 minutes long.

Open the pan, stir and flip the kale, and sprinkle with rosemary and any other spice of your liking. 

Nom, nom, nom

Stir it, until the kale is evenly coated then re-cover. Ignore it for another 2 minutes or so. I find The Beatles, Blackbird, a great way to pass that time...and I attempt to sing along. This usually clears the room.

Add about 2 tbsp of balsamic vinegar, then cover again. Let cook for about 2 more minutes, shimmy around to The Kinks, You Really Got Me, remove from the heat and enjoy.

In the interest of full disclosure, I will admit that I tend to pick small pieces out, throughout the process and taste them, to determine if I want more salt or rosemary or whatever. I figure every batch is a little different, so go with it. That or I am hungry and have impulse issues. 

Its sure to be one of those.

Jingle This...

Seems December has come and gone, and I was pretty slack about posting...::shrug::. I'm sure you'll get over it, right?

Such a good sport!

So, we kicked off the month in grand form, by running the Jingle Bell Dash for Cash...which was a new race this year...a 10K. Up and at 'em, bright and early, on a frosty December morning, we donned festive running clothes...an elfish get up for me, and a penguin hat for the hubster.

Though you can't see it in the picture, that elf hat has a big ole jingle bell on the end of it. A bell that drove the poor hubster to the verge of insanity. It would jingle-jingle-jingle as I ran, to the point he was just about to grab it and rip it off...when, inexplicably? It'd stop...for just long enough that he would shake the urge to go Hulk-Smash on my hat...at which point it would start up again. (Of course it would, lol)

We stayed together for the whole course, and chatted on and off...when we weren't dying from the seemingly endless uphill. At one point, we had been climbing for what felt like days, and we got to what looked to be the top and a turn. One of the volunteers was standing there, cheering folks on and directing them to the next part of the course. She gleefully shouted "Just take the first right at the top!"

If you're dorky and you know it... ;)

We looked at one another and I said "Did she say top?? You mean we have to keep going up?!?!?" Lol...

We finished the race at a respectable 52:50. Not lighting the world on fire, but certainly not a bad time...at least for us.

After the race, was the awards ceremony. There were cash prizes for top finishers, for costumes and just random drawings. We got lucky, and my named was called for one of the $50 prizes.

All in all, an overall good time.

A fun event, a hilly course and cash prices made this a run that we will definitely look to do again next year.